bikram broke my groin

shortly after I'd wondered why I had the constant need to "open up my hips" (in terms of yoga), a couple of students and the teacher, out of nowhere, said that's where a lot of our emotional baggage is stored. I never asked, said a word or mentioned it, but it was like they read my mind! I also googled it and it's true, true because I felt a difference even before knowing why. there was even a day where I felt so light that nothing mattered, like I was floating. man, it was bliss.

speaking of yoga, My 30-day Bikram challenge isn't going so well. it's become more like "every-other-day Bikram challenge." I mean, Bikram is good. I like Bikram. I LOVE to sweat. I get used to the heat, and the smell isn't really bad unless you're taking a class right after another. I like seeing how far I could go but also being conscious of my "edge." and this is where my problem with Bikram is. I don't know if other people have experienced the same thing, and this is just my logic speaking which is already pretty questionable anyway, but when you're in a 105 degree room and your muscles are loose, is it possible to take yourself over your edge without realizing it because of how loose your muscles are? am I crazy? I woke up one morning after a great night with Bikram and I had pain in my groinal area. is groinal even a word? I don't care whatever. upper, right hind groin. there. I've never even gotten aches from running, dancing, hiking, or regular yoga! it's kind of been around for a little over a week and it hurts to do stretches. I'm thinking I pulled a muscle but I'm no doctor so it doesn't really matter, does it?

regular yoga, on the other hand, just keeps getting better and better. I surprise myself with what I'm capable of. still struggling to quiet the mind, but I love it, everytime.

your soul is a ghost town. your heart, a sunken ship.

one of the things i live for: cycling downhill at an adrenaline-pumping fast speed and be fearless enough to not even let your fingers tip toe the hand brakes.

my bike gets used up a lot during the summer. i usually ride through the l.a. river bike path and griffith park, but someday, i'd love to run away to the countryside of france or italy and use my bicycle as my main mode of transport.

there are good things ahead. more road trips are in the works which can only mean one thing. hiking! and perhaps camping and some more bike riding...